Getting Out In A Bad Relationship
So, you thought you have finally found the ONE.
Someone who has an established career, with stable financial status, responsible, good looking, intelligent, and good-humored person has finally come into your life.
But, just when you thought you’ve finally met the ideal man or woman of your dreams, everything seems to be wrong and complicated. Suddenly, he has lost his job, she went bankrupt, he became careless, and she became paranoid about everything. You try to help your partner in dealing with the issues but it always turns out that he or she’s too good to ask help from anybody-even you.
Still, despite everything you still do almost everything to help your beau without you realizing that he or she slowly drags you into the pit of depression and helplessness they’re in. When you feel that you are no longer healthy, happy, and growing in the relationship, that’s the time when you are trapped in bad relationship.
Being stuck and stranded
It is always hard to end any kind of relationship-especially if it’s a romantic relationship. But, no matter how hard to end something that you thought is precious, you should know when to end a relationship especially if you are well-aware that its not doing you any good.
The signs of the times would probably tell you if you are already being stuck in a bad relationship. Experts agree that the relationship is already bad when the couple is going through unusual periods of disagreement and bitterness that can be evitable in some relationships. You will also know if you are already in the pit of a bad relationship when it involves incessant aggravation and everything-even your partner-seems to be out of your reach.
The main determinant if you are in a bad relationship is the behavior of your partner. You can tell that you are being caught up in a bad relationship if your partner is beyond your reach of communication and comprehension, he or she doesn’t want to make any commitment, doesn’t profess his or her feelings even if there is a sort of commitment or plainly incapable of loving someone else besides him or herself.
Studies also show that in any bad relationship, the couple is often on dissimilar wavelengths that there is almost no common ground and no connection or communication that result to irritation and disappointment.
Since bad relationships usually stem from chronic reciprocation of what one or both partners need, the relationship itself can even damage the self-esteem of the persons involved. Bad relationships are also destructive for persons especially those who have invested so much in their careers for their personal lives since these serve as a perfect breeding ground for rage, bitterness, self-doubt, melancholy, and distress.
Aside from emotional distress, staying in a bad relationship can be hazardous to someone’s health. The most common hazard of bad relationship is the physical harm caused by an abusive partner. In less severe cases, being in a bad relationship can cause tensions and various chemical changes often triggered by so much stress.
Being in a bad relationship reflects so much on the person’s overall health and well-being because it can drain energy, thus, lowering the body’s resistance to illness. The common health hazards of being in a bad relationship include severe headaches, back pains, and stomachaches caused by anger and frustration; insomnia and melancholy caused by emotional distress; and weight problems caused by irregular behavioral patterns and depression.
If couples continue to be in a relationship that is no longer healthy, they will try to find a way to escape from being stuck inside by being alcoholic or drug dependent. Worse, being stuck in an unhealthy relationship can eventually lead to recurrent suicide attempts.
Breaking free
What most people inside relationships do not realize is that the more they try to work things out, things get more and more complicated. This is because both people in the relationship try so hard to pass through the stage without realizing that they are detaching themselves with their respective partners. As a result of this detachment is misunderstanding, incompatibility, and soon enough, falling out of love.
If you are already in a bad relationship that robs you off your freedom to be yourself, the freedom to love other person, and the freedom to get out of an unhealthy and destructive relationship, here are some of the things you can do to recover.
1. Consider your wellness as the first priority in life whether you are in or out of a romantic relationship.
2. Try to be “selfish” at times by focusing on your own needs above all else.
3. Be strong enough to deal with your own problems.
4. Have a positive outlook in life and cultivate whatever positive values you acquired within the relationship.
5. Nurture you spiritual side and try to look for ways or activities that can bring you inner peace.
6. If the relationship was quite traumatic, think of getting professional help or find a support group where you can chare your experiences and the lessons you have learned.
7. Don’t be afraid to fall in love but try to be more cautious next time so you won’t be stuck in a bad relationship.
Someone who has an established career, with stable financial status, responsible, good looking, intelligent, and good-humored person has finally come into your life.
But, just when you thought you’ve finally met the ideal man or woman of your dreams, everything seems to be wrong and complicated. Suddenly, he has lost his job, she went bankrupt, he became careless, and she became paranoid about everything. You try to help your partner in dealing with the issues but it always turns out that he or she’s too good to ask help from anybody-even you.
Still, despite everything you still do almost everything to help your beau without you realizing that he or she slowly drags you into the pit of depression and helplessness they’re in. When you feel that you are no longer healthy, happy, and growing in the relationship, that’s the time when you are trapped in bad relationship.
Being stuck and stranded
It is always hard to end any kind of relationship-especially if it’s a romantic relationship. But, no matter how hard to end something that you thought is precious, you should know when to end a relationship especially if you are well-aware that its not doing you any good.
The signs of the times would probably tell you if you are already being stuck in a bad relationship. Experts agree that the relationship is already bad when the couple is going through unusual periods of disagreement and bitterness that can be evitable in some relationships. You will also know if you are already in the pit of a bad relationship when it involves incessant aggravation and everything-even your partner-seems to be out of your reach.
The main determinant if you are in a bad relationship is the behavior of your partner. You can tell that you are being caught up in a bad relationship if your partner is beyond your reach of communication and comprehension, he or she doesn’t want to make any commitment, doesn’t profess his or her feelings even if there is a sort of commitment or plainly incapable of loving someone else besides him or herself.
Studies also show that in any bad relationship, the couple is often on dissimilar wavelengths that there is almost no common ground and no connection or communication that result to irritation and disappointment.
Since bad relationships usually stem from chronic reciprocation of what one or both partners need, the relationship itself can even damage the self-esteem of the persons involved. Bad relationships are also destructive for persons especially those who have invested so much in their careers for their personal lives since these serve as a perfect breeding ground for rage, bitterness, self-doubt, melancholy, and distress.
Aside from emotional distress, staying in a bad relationship can be hazardous to someone’s health. The most common hazard of bad relationship is the physical harm caused by an abusive partner. In less severe cases, being in a bad relationship can cause tensions and various chemical changes often triggered by so much stress.
Being in a bad relationship reflects so much on the person’s overall health and well-being because it can drain energy, thus, lowering the body’s resistance to illness. The common health hazards of being in a bad relationship include severe headaches, back pains, and stomachaches caused by anger and frustration; insomnia and melancholy caused by emotional distress; and weight problems caused by irregular behavioral patterns and depression.
If couples continue to be in a relationship that is no longer healthy, they will try to find a way to escape from being stuck inside by being alcoholic or drug dependent. Worse, being stuck in an unhealthy relationship can eventually lead to recurrent suicide attempts.
Breaking free
What most people inside relationships do not realize is that the more they try to work things out, things get more and more complicated. This is because both people in the relationship try so hard to pass through the stage without realizing that they are detaching themselves with their respective partners. As a result of this detachment is misunderstanding, incompatibility, and soon enough, falling out of love.
If you are already in a bad relationship that robs you off your freedom to be yourself, the freedom to love other person, and the freedom to get out of an unhealthy and destructive relationship, here are some of the things you can do to recover.
1. Consider your wellness as the first priority in life whether you are in or out of a romantic relationship.
2. Try to be “selfish” at times by focusing on your own needs above all else.
3. Be strong enough to deal with your own problems.
4. Have a positive outlook in life and cultivate whatever positive values you acquired within the relationship.
5. Nurture you spiritual side and try to look for ways or activities that can bring you inner peace.
6. If the relationship was quite traumatic, think of getting professional help or find a support group where you can chare your experiences and the lessons you have learned.
7. Don’t be afraid to fall in love but try to be more cautious next time so you won’t be stuck in a bad relationship.
Interracial Relationships
It all started when the first English occupants in America have built their colonies in the 1600’s. The Americans have been criticizing these interracial relationships because they do not want a black slave to marry a white person. These relationships have been highly contested in the states of Pennsylvania, North and South Carolina, Massachusetts, and Maryland where there are laws that prohibited interracial marriage.
By the year 1691, the state of Virginia have charged serious offenses to interracial couples and labeling their siblings to be bastards and outcast in the society. When the 13th amendment on the American constitution was instituted in 1865 in some southern states of America, slavery on blacks was abolished. However, interracial marriage is not yet allowed and will still be banned from every part of the country. The reason is, many white Americans do not want any black slaves or Native Americans pollute their genuine white race.
Many believe that 70 percent of black Americans nowadays are descendants of interracial couples. Many great black Americans that have lived like Martin Luther King Jr. and Booker T. Washington came from black and white ancestors. In the civil war era where blacks have been fighting for equal rights, Frederick Douglas was very vocal on saying that interracial marriage can trigger the acceptance of the exiled black slaves in the American society.
When the Supreme Court has abolished the last anti-miscegenation laws on interracial marriages, there was a great increase on the number of relationships that involved blacks and whites. Although the law now accepts it, there is still the existence of cultural betrayal. Many black Americans believe that whenever their children are dating or suppose to marry a white, they are betraying their families and especially their cultural heritage.
Many interracial couples have fought for this kind of relationship to be accepted with open arms in every society because they believe that it can come up to be the solution on racial prejudice and racial conflicts. They call for reconciliation because they see the world one day living in equality and racism is no more tolerated. More importantly, race is not an issue anymore because everybody is unified as one in the eyes of God, which is the human race.
Interracial relationships have some advantages and disadvantages, although there could be a number of advantages to be identified but some may encounter problems when they are in interracial relationships. Here are some that can be advantageous or disadvantageous in some aspects.
1.It can bring to a more colorful family history. Family members can learn more on their heritage and their ancestors. It can be an interesting subject whenever there are stories why their ancestors came to this place and how they have lived their lives even they have different races.
2.It could be more appealing to others, if the person is a combination of two different races. The feeling of uniqueness can be an attraction especially if the person knows how to blend well to different societies. In some instances a person with interracial heritage can feel fresh if he has places to visit if both of his parents came from two different countries.
3.If a person is hanging out with someone with a different racial origin, there is the opportunity to learn the person’s culture and tradition. These can be very interesting subjects to carry as the person goes home, and he may share to his peers what he had learned and experience.
4. Sometimes the acceptance can be very disturbing. There are some people that cannot get over on the reality that people can now live together even with different races. Most parents in this generation that have children that are product of interracial relationships still experience some isolated cases of discrimination and prejudice.
5.There are also cases where there are children that were born on interracial relationships come back to their heritage to get some revenge because of the racial issue that were not accepted in their situations. This could not be a good resort to get over the anger and hatred. Some people do these things as their responsibility to point out their reasons. These instances may lead to family conflicts and feud.
Interracial relationships may be good or bad depending on one’s principle. No matter what origin or race the person may come from, it is important that people realize that all people are created equal in eyes of God. People must learn how to accept no matter what the color, the race and tradition.
By the year 1691, the state of Virginia have charged serious offenses to interracial couples and labeling their siblings to be bastards and outcast in the society. When the 13th amendment on the American constitution was instituted in 1865 in some southern states of America, slavery on blacks was abolished. However, interracial marriage is not yet allowed and will still be banned from every part of the country. The reason is, many white Americans do not want any black slaves or Native Americans pollute their genuine white race.
Many believe that 70 percent of black Americans nowadays are descendants of interracial couples. Many great black Americans that have lived like Martin Luther King Jr. and Booker T. Washington came from black and white ancestors. In the civil war era where blacks have been fighting for equal rights, Frederick Douglas was very vocal on saying that interracial marriage can trigger the acceptance of the exiled black slaves in the American society.
When the Supreme Court has abolished the last anti-miscegenation laws on interracial marriages, there was a great increase on the number of relationships that involved blacks and whites. Although the law now accepts it, there is still the existence of cultural betrayal. Many black Americans believe that whenever their children are dating or suppose to marry a white, they are betraying their families and especially their cultural heritage.
Many interracial couples have fought for this kind of relationship to be accepted with open arms in every society because they believe that it can come up to be the solution on racial prejudice and racial conflicts. They call for reconciliation because they see the world one day living in equality and racism is no more tolerated. More importantly, race is not an issue anymore because everybody is unified as one in the eyes of God, which is the human race.
Interracial relationships have some advantages and disadvantages, although there could be a number of advantages to be identified but some may encounter problems when they are in interracial relationships. Here are some that can be advantageous or disadvantageous in some aspects.
1.It can bring to a more colorful family history. Family members can learn more on their heritage and their ancestors. It can be an interesting subject whenever there are stories why their ancestors came to this place and how they have lived their lives even they have different races.
2.It could be more appealing to others, if the person is a combination of two different races. The feeling of uniqueness can be an attraction especially if the person knows how to blend well to different societies. In some instances a person with interracial heritage can feel fresh if he has places to visit if both of his parents came from two different countries.
3.If a person is hanging out with someone with a different racial origin, there is the opportunity to learn the person’s culture and tradition. These can be very interesting subjects to carry as the person goes home, and he may share to his peers what he had learned and experience.
4. Sometimes the acceptance can be very disturbing. There are some people that cannot get over on the reality that people can now live together even with different races. Most parents in this generation that have children that are product of interracial relationships still experience some isolated cases of discrimination and prejudice.
5.There are also cases where there are children that were born on interracial relationships come back to their heritage to get some revenge because of the racial issue that were not accepted in their situations. This could not be a good resort to get over the anger and hatred. Some people do these things as their responsibility to point out their reasons. These instances may lead to family conflicts and feud.
Interracial relationships may be good or bad depending on one’s principle. No matter what origin or race the person may come from, it is important that people realize that all people are created equal in eyes of God. People must learn how to accept no matter what the color, the race and tradition.
How to Deal With an Emotional Ex if You are Considering Him to be Your Ex Love Partner for Your Making Up Relationship?
How to deal with an emotional ex if you are considering him to be your ex love partner for your making up relationship?
Does your ex call you often and tell you they miss you? Perhaps they’re cold one minute and hot the next. Their attitudes and behaviour change depending on the day of the week and you’re unsure what is really going on inside that head of theirs.
First of all, emotional ex’s usually spell trouble. If you’re dealing with one, protect your heart because it’s likely they will break it again… and again. Usually they’re the immature type that haven’t done enough growing up yet and their wants and needs change depending on the weather of the day.
Sure they can be lovable but they also turn on and off like a switch. Be careful and guard yourself!
You sure you want to get back together with an emotional ex?
If you want to get back with your emotional ex, you have come to a right article!
Building Great Relationships with Emotional Intelligence Tools
The best things in life depend on our ability to create and maintain great relationships. Success, happiness, and the ability to give and receive love all hinge on our relationships. Most of us do a good job with relationships at the start. But why do we so often stumble down the road? Why do relationships develop such challenging problems?
Learn the five key emotional intelligence skills we need to build great relationships and heal relationship problems.
How does emotional intelligence help our relationships?
Emotions are the building blocks of each relationship in our lives, and the power of those emotions cannot be overlooked. Emotions override our thoughts and profoundly influence our behaviour.
Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize, control, and effectively communicate our own emotions, and to recognize the emotions of other people. Emotional intelligence skills allow us to use our emotional building blocks to construct a solid foundation for communication. Well-developed emotional intelligence skills are a better predictor of success in all areas of life (and particularly in relationships) than the traditional measurement of high cognitive intelligence, or IQ.
As the foundation for all verbal and nonverbal communication, emotional intelligence:
Empowers you to build healthy new relationships
Helps you strengthen existing relationships
Helps you to better understand other people
Helps you to better understand yourself
Enhances your abilities to communicate effectively
Emotional Intelligence Is Not Something You’re Born with-It’s Learned
Social and emotional experience starts in infancy with the child’s attachment relationship to his or her mother, or primary caretaker. If you are lucky, and had caretakers who recognized, understood, and responded to your emotional needs as a baby, you integrated the emotional and intellectual parts of your brain and absorbed a skill set that formed the basis of Emotional Intelligence.
If the attachment relationship isn’t secure, the emotional parts of the brain do not become well integrated with the intellectual parts. The personal and interpersonal skills needed to sustain great relationships will be weak or flawed. But because these skills are learned, they can also be acquired later in life-if absorbed in social and emotional contexts that attract the brain’s attention!
Test Your Emotional Intelligence
What is your current emotional intelligence skill level? Most of us have relationship problems at times with co workers, acquaintances, friends, relatives, or other people we care about. Your emotional intelligence is your set of key relationship skills that help you establish strong relationships and deal with relationship problems. Find your emotional intelligence skill level by answering usually, sometimes, or rarely to the questions in this quick relationship quiz.
Do you maintain contact when talking to most people? Or are you quick to answer your cell phone-and easily distracted by things having nothing to do with the conversation? Are you comfortable with pauses? Do you feel at ease when no one is speaking? Or if something in the conversation strikes an emotional nerve, is that okay? Do you sense when someone feels troubled before being told? Can you walk into a meeting and immediately tell who may be upset?
Do you judge or criticize some of your emotions or feelings? Do you pay attention to your gut feelings when making important decisions? Would you do or not do something that seemed logical because you have a contradictory feeling? Do you immediately notice when you become stressed? Do you know how to quickly and dependably reduce stress to a comfortable level? Do you easily laugh, play or kid around with others? Do you use humour to negotiate differences or rough spots?
Can you easily face up to differences? Or do disagreements with colleagues, friends or loved ones feel threatening?
Answering “usually”, to most of the questions indicates that you have a good start toward emotionally intelligent communication in your relationships. If your answers were primarily “sometimes” or “rarely”, you may need some help with your Emotional Intelligence - but it’s never too late to learn these skills and raise your emotional intelligence abilities. You can improve your current relationships, and forge strong new ones-both in your personal life and the workplace.
Five tools for emotional intelligence to help build and maintain great relationships
By incorporating the five basic tools of Emotional Intelligence, you can enhance your relationships in the workplace, at home and in all areas of your life.
1. The Elastic helps you reduce stress and avoid emotional overload
Out of control stress triggers knee-jerk fight or flight responses that make us feel like running or fighting -but not much of anything else. When this happens, and it commonly does, our emotions and the emotions of others can seem threatening and overwhelming.
2. The Glue helps you stay emotionally connected to yourself and others emotionally intelligent communication is fundamentally nonverbal, emotionally-driven communication. Emotion points us in the direction of what we really need, and is our primary source of motivation. Remove the emotional parts of the brain, and people lose their desire to do much of anything.
3. The Pulley helps you attract and hold the attention of others
Nonverbal communication is the lifelong pulley that consciously or unconsciously sends either positive or negative signals to others. Nothing reveals more to others about us, or attracts others to us, than wordless communication.
4. The Ladder helps you rise above life’s difficulties
All emotional exchange strengthens relationships, but sharing humour and the delight of play adds a unique restorative healing element, Mutual playfulness reduces stress, defuses anger, mends fences, and lifts spirits.
5. The Velvet Hammer helps you handle conflict in a positive way
Painful upset is an unavoidable part of life. But conflict resolved is a velvet hammer that can be a cornerstone for trust between people. When conflict isn’t perceived as threatening or punishing, it fosters freedom, creativity, trust and safety in relationships.
These 5 relationship tools will:
Help you see yourself and others in a new light , Help you recognize the difference between damaging communication and helpful communication , Help you discover resources for remaining calm and focused, regardless of the circumstances , Help you discover and improve your emotional awareness , Help you find more playfulness and joy in your relationships, at work or at home.
The relationship tools can enable you to transform conflict, using it as an opportunity for building trust and avoiding resentment, Emotional intelligence skills will have a dramatic effect on your relationships at home and at work. Each article in this series will guide you through exercises, quizzes, and examples that will help you learn specific emotional intelligence ability.
As you acquire each ability, you will increase your emotional intelligence and your ability to master the next skill. In the end, you will get to know a newly empowered individual-yourself-and become very comfortable with your ability to attract the respect and affection of others.
Indeed, life is short. Don’t let another day go by without taking a chance on happiness. You will never know until you try, so remember to make a move today. It can change or affect the rest of your life, therefore, at the very least, you can try to come out something for your ex love partner during your weekend plans. With a little practice, perseverance and patience, I believe that your relationship could be enhanced with the tips that I have shared earlier. If you have faced any problems with your loved ones, do not hesitate to visit this piece of article again. I really have a strong belief that if you can understand what I have explained and applied what you have learnt from this piece of article, your problems can be eventually solved and your making up relationship can become more stable and stronger. I wish all the best for your making up relationship with your partner. Do always remember to spread word of mouth to your fellow friends for supporting the decision of having making up than breaking up.
How to get your girlfriend back?
Watch a video that shows you exactly what you must NEVER do, what you should do to get your ex back and why at http://www.squidoo.com/how_can_i_retrieve_my_ex_lover_back
You will also learn how to reverse the situation if you have already done those things that should NEVER be done.
Does your ex call you often and tell you they miss you? Perhaps they’re cold one minute and hot the next. Their attitudes and behaviour change depending on the day of the week and you’re unsure what is really going on inside that head of theirs.
First of all, emotional ex’s usually spell trouble. If you’re dealing with one, protect your heart because it’s likely they will break it again… and again. Usually they’re the immature type that haven’t done enough growing up yet and their wants and needs change depending on the weather of the day.
Sure they can be lovable but they also turn on and off like a switch. Be careful and guard yourself!
You sure you want to get back together with an emotional ex?
If you want to get back with your emotional ex, you have come to a right article!
Building Great Relationships with Emotional Intelligence Tools
The best things in life depend on our ability to create and maintain great relationships. Success, happiness, and the ability to give and receive love all hinge on our relationships. Most of us do a good job with relationships at the start. But why do we so often stumble down the road? Why do relationships develop such challenging problems?
Learn the five key emotional intelligence skills we need to build great relationships and heal relationship problems.
How does emotional intelligence help our relationships?
Emotions are the building blocks of each relationship in our lives, and the power of those emotions cannot be overlooked. Emotions override our thoughts and profoundly influence our behaviour.
Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize, control, and effectively communicate our own emotions, and to recognize the emotions of other people. Emotional intelligence skills allow us to use our emotional building blocks to construct a solid foundation for communication. Well-developed emotional intelligence skills are a better predictor of success in all areas of life (and particularly in relationships) than the traditional measurement of high cognitive intelligence, or IQ.
As the foundation for all verbal and nonverbal communication, emotional intelligence:
Empowers you to build healthy new relationships
Helps you strengthen existing relationships
Helps you to better understand other people
Helps you to better understand yourself
Enhances your abilities to communicate effectively
Emotional Intelligence Is Not Something You’re Born with-It’s Learned
Social and emotional experience starts in infancy with the child’s attachment relationship to his or her mother, or primary caretaker. If you are lucky, and had caretakers who recognized, understood, and responded to your emotional needs as a baby, you integrated the emotional and intellectual parts of your brain and absorbed a skill set that formed the basis of Emotional Intelligence.
If the attachment relationship isn’t secure, the emotional parts of the brain do not become well integrated with the intellectual parts. The personal and interpersonal skills needed to sustain great relationships will be weak or flawed. But because these skills are learned, they can also be acquired later in life-if absorbed in social and emotional contexts that attract the brain’s attention!
Test Your Emotional Intelligence
What is your current emotional intelligence skill level? Most of us have relationship problems at times with co workers, acquaintances, friends, relatives, or other people we care about. Your emotional intelligence is your set of key relationship skills that help you establish strong relationships and deal with relationship problems. Find your emotional intelligence skill level by answering usually, sometimes, or rarely to the questions in this quick relationship quiz.
Do you maintain contact when talking to most people? Or are you quick to answer your cell phone-and easily distracted by things having nothing to do with the conversation? Are you comfortable with pauses? Do you feel at ease when no one is speaking? Or if something in the conversation strikes an emotional nerve, is that okay? Do you sense when someone feels troubled before being told? Can you walk into a meeting and immediately tell who may be upset?
Do you judge or criticize some of your emotions or feelings? Do you pay attention to your gut feelings when making important decisions? Would you do or not do something that seemed logical because you have a contradictory feeling? Do you immediately notice when you become stressed? Do you know how to quickly and dependably reduce stress to a comfortable level? Do you easily laugh, play or kid around with others? Do you use humour to negotiate differences or rough spots?
Can you easily face up to differences? Or do disagreements with colleagues, friends or loved ones feel threatening?
Answering “usually”, to most of the questions indicates that you have a good start toward emotionally intelligent communication in your relationships. If your answers were primarily “sometimes” or “rarely”, you may need some help with your Emotional Intelligence - but it’s never too late to learn these skills and raise your emotional intelligence abilities. You can improve your current relationships, and forge strong new ones-both in your personal life and the workplace.
Five tools for emotional intelligence to help build and maintain great relationships
By incorporating the five basic tools of Emotional Intelligence, you can enhance your relationships in the workplace, at home and in all areas of your life.
1. The Elastic helps you reduce stress and avoid emotional overload
Out of control stress triggers knee-jerk fight or flight responses that make us feel like running or fighting -but not much of anything else. When this happens, and it commonly does, our emotions and the emotions of others can seem threatening and overwhelming.
2. The Glue helps you stay emotionally connected to yourself and others emotionally intelligent communication is fundamentally nonverbal, emotionally-driven communication. Emotion points us in the direction of what we really need, and is our primary source of motivation. Remove the emotional parts of the brain, and people lose their desire to do much of anything.
3. The Pulley helps you attract and hold the attention of others
Nonverbal communication is the lifelong pulley that consciously or unconsciously sends either positive or negative signals to others. Nothing reveals more to others about us, or attracts others to us, than wordless communication.
4. The Ladder helps you rise above life’s difficulties
All emotional exchange strengthens relationships, but sharing humour and the delight of play adds a unique restorative healing element, Mutual playfulness reduces stress, defuses anger, mends fences, and lifts spirits.
5. The Velvet Hammer helps you handle conflict in a positive way
Painful upset is an unavoidable part of life. But conflict resolved is a velvet hammer that can be a cornerstone for trust between people. When conflict isn’t perceived as threatening or punishing, it fosters freedom, creativity, trust and safety in relationships.
These 5 relationship tools will:
Help you see yourself and others in a new light , Help you recognize the difference between damaging communication and helpful communication , Help you discover resources for remaining calm and focused, regardless of the circumstances , Help you discover and improve your emotional awareness , Help you find more playfulness and joy in your relationships, at work or at home.
The relationship tools can enable you to transform conflict, using it as an opportunity for building trust and avoiding resentment, Emotional intelligence skills will have a dramatic effect on your relationships at home and at work. Each article in this series will guide you through exercises, quizzes, and examples that will help you learn specific emotional intelligence ability.
As you acquire each ability, you will increase your emotional intelligence and your ability to master the next skill. In the end, you will get to know a newly empowered individual-yourself-and become very comfortable with your ability to attract the respect and affection of others.
Indeed, life is short. Don’t let another day go by without taking a chance on happiness. You will never know until you try, so remember to make a move today. It can change or affect the rest of your life, therefore, at the very least, you can try to come out something for your ex love partner during your weekend plans. With a little practice, perseverance and patience, I believe that your relationship could be enhanced with the tips that I have shared earlier. If you have faced any problems with your loved ones, do not hesitate to visit this piece of article again. I really have a strong belief that if you can understand what I have explained and applied what you have learnt from this piece of article, your problems can be eventually solved and your making up relationship can become more stable and stronger. I wish all the best for your making up relationship with your partner. Do always remember to spread word of mouth to your fellow friends for supporting the decision of having making up than breaking up.
How to get your girlfriend back?
Watch a video that shows you exactly what you must NEVER do, what you should do to get your ex back and why at http://www.squidoo.com/how_can_i_retrieve_my_ex_lover_back
You will also learn how to reverse the situation if you have already done those things that should NEVER be done.
Keep Your Cool-don’t Allow Anger to Control Your Relationships
If you anger easily, perhaps you need some techniques to Keep Your Cool. How you handle anger is how your children assume adults are supposed to handle anger and thus they use you as a role model.
Look deeply in your heart and discover what you are really mad about? Rarely is the anger about the present incident, but rather unmet needs from the past.
Do you want your children to respect you? Is the underlying need for respect? Do you want people to assume personal responsiblity? Know your limits. Accept what you can’t change and let go of things out of your control.
Here are some ideas that have worked for other parents. Try them and see if you can control your anger rather than let your anger control you.
Ease your tension. Take a walk; listen to music, splash cold water on your face.
Earn small rewards when you make the choice not to become angry.
Phone a friend. It helps to share your concerns and talk things out.
Your example helps your children learn to handle anger. Be a good role model.
Object to the behavior if necessary, but separate the “deed from the doer.”
Use your kitchen timer for “time out” before disciplining.
Remember that everyone makes mistakes, including you and your children.
Count your breaths. Breathe in deep while counting to four. Breathe out while counting to four. Do four times.
Old tapes in your head may be making your reaction more than it should be. Are you angry because of issues in your childhood?
Out of ideas to handle anger?
Consider parenting classes or professional counseling.
Look objectively at the situation. Are you making a mountain out of a molehill? Is it really worth having a heart attack or stroke? This too shall pass.
Controlling angry feelings is a skill that children learn from the people who care for them. There are activities which support our development of self-control. Count to twenty, backwards! We all need to find helpful ways to intervene when anger and frustration overwhelms us or our children.
Look deeply in your heart and discover what you are really mad about? Rarely is the anger about the present incident, but rather unmet needs from the past.
Do you want your children to respect you? Is the underlying need for respect? Do you want people to assume personal responsiblity? Know your limits. Accept what you can’t change and let go of things out of your control.
Here are some ideas that have worked for other parents. Try them and see if you can control your anger rather than let your anger control you.
Ease your tension. Take a walk; listen to music, splash cold water on your face.
Earn small rewards when you make the choice not to become angry.
Phone a friend. It helps to share your concerns and talk things out.
Your example helps your children learn to handle anger. Be a good role model.
Object to the behavior if necessary, but separate the “deed from the doer.”
Use your kitchen timer for “time out” before disciplining.
Remember that everyone makes mistakes, including you and your children.
Count your breaths. Breathe in deep while counting to four. Breathe out while counting to four. Do four times.
Old tapes in your head may be making your reaction more than it should be. Are you angry because of issues in your childhood?
Out of ideas to handle anger?
Consider parenting classes or professional counseling.
Look objectively at the situation. Are you making a mountain out of a molehill? Is it really worth having a heart attack or stroke? This too shall pass.
Controlling angry feelings is a skill that children learn from the people who care for them. There are activities which support our development of self-control. Count to twenty, backwards! We all need to find helpful ways to intervene when anger and frustration overwhelms us or our children.
Building Trust In A Relationship — What Does It Mean?
Building trust in a relationship, what does it mean? There are many types of human relationship like relationship between husband and wife, relationship between parents and child, relationship between boyfriend and girlfriend, relationship between friends and many more. Let’s explore more on what does it mean by building trust in a relationship.
Human beings are fundamentally social creatures. They need to have physical and physiological interactions. These interactions are what we called relationships. There are different classifications of relationships. You have the casual relationship, intimate relationship, business relationship and other classification of relationship.
When we talked about building trust in a relationship, we are generally talking about intimate relationship where the relationship is a particularly close interpersonal relationship in which the participants know and trust each other very well or are confidance of one another or a relationship where there is physical or emotional intimacy. This is where in intimate relationship – building trust in a relationship is very important for the relationship to grow and blossom.
The keyword in building trust is the word dependable. You must develop this attribute in order to build the trust in your relationship. You must be dependable for the other person in the relationship to put his or her trust in you in the particular relationship.
Can I trust you to be faithful to me — meaning can I depend on you? Can I trust you to be there for me — meaning can I depend on you? Can I trust you to protect me — meaning can I depend on you? Can I trust you to be honest with me — meaning can I depend on you?
Building trust is not by words or intentions. Building trust is by your deeds or actions. These deeds or actions have to be repeated. These deeds or actions have to be consistent. You cannot buy trust. You have to earn the trust. There is no shortcut but just constant efforts to earn the trust.
If you value your relationship, then you have to work on building the trust in your relationship. It is the basic foundation for your relationship to grow and blossom. Without a foundation, your relationship will not be strong enough to withstand the challenges in life. Watch video with great tips on building trust in a relationship here.
Human beings are fundamentally social creatures. They need to have physical and physiological interactions. These interactions are what we called relationships. There are different classifications of relationships. You have the casual relationship, intimate relationship, business relationship and other classification of relationship.
When we talked about building trust in a relationship, we are generally talking about intimate relationship where the relationship is a particularly close interpersonal relationship in which the participants know and trust each other very well or are confidance of one another or a relationship where there is physical or emotional intimacy. This is where in intimate relationship – building trust in a relationship is very important for the relationship to grow and blossom.
The keyword in building trust is the word dependable. You must develop this attribute in order to build the trust in your relationship. You must be dependable for the other person in the relationship to put his or her trust in you in the particular relationship.
Can I trust you to be faithful to me — meaning can I depend on you? Can I trust you to be there for me — meaning can I depend on you? Can I trust you to protect me — meaning can I depend on you? Can I trust you to be honest with me — meaning can I depend on you?
Building trust is not by words or intentions. Building trust is by your deeds or actions. These deeds or actions have to be repeated. These deeds or actions have to be consistent. You cannot buy trust. You have to earn the trust. There is no shortcut but just constant efforts to earn the trust.
If you value your relationship, then you have to work on building the trust in your relationship. It is the basic foundation for your relationship to grow and blossom. Without a foundation, your relationship will not be strong enough to withstand the challenges in life. Watch video with great tips on building trust in a relationship here.
Are You the Victim of an Addictive Relationship?
Nobody likes dealing with an addictive relationship, though lots of people get stuck in bad relationships, and no good can come of it. Dysfunctional relationships can be hard to define, and therefore it can be difficult to determine if you are in one. However, a bad relationship is something to be taken seriously. If you can identify the problem, you are one step closer to the solution.
An addictive relationship tends to isolate either or both partners from the outdide world. It is the exact same thing as a drug dependence something that keeps them away from the things that they love and the other things that they should be doing. An addictive relationship is truly a dysfunctional relationship because it is defined by an increasing craving to be with a person, and by withdrawal symptoms that go along with being away from them. It also has the some of the same signs as other addictions, such as low self-esteem, passivity, magical thinking, lack of initiative, and helplessness.
Here are 7 indicators of an addictive relationship. If you find that your relationship has these things or any number of them, chances are good that you are in a bad relationship, and should consider getting out of it.
1. If you feel that you are magnetically drawn to another person, even if the person is not good for you, it might be a dysfunctional relationship. This might include a person that is too far away, married, not interested, or emotionally unavailable. If these things are true about your partner, yet you feel like you are drawn to them, it could be an addictive relationship.
2. If you try to change the person that you are with in order to be a person that you’d like to be with, this is not a good relationship to be in. If you find yourself constantly thinking that the relationship would be perfect if the person could just change a little bit, it is a sign of a bad relationship.
3. If know that the relationships is bad for you, but you are not able to break it off, this is a sign of an addictive relationship. you may not feel deserving of a positive relationship, perhaps you are so worried about the others reaction to a break up you lose sight of your own needs. Either way, these are signs of a negative relationship.
4. If you notice the realtioships of other happy people seem boring compared to yours, it may be a sign you are hooked on the chaos of an addictive relationship. There is a big probability that you would spurn these people to stay in your current relationship.
5. If you don’t feel that you can be independent within your relationship, even though you might be independent in other areas, it might be a sign of an addictive relationship.
6. If it is hard to say ‘no’ and stick to it and you find yourself always giving in to your partners needs, this is another sign.
7. If your relationship makes you feel self-doubt, it is a sign that your relationship is dysfunctional.
If you find that you are in an addictive relationship, the best thing to do is to get out of the relationship. However, seek help from family and friends, and even professionals, so that you can avoid going back to the person, and so that you can learn how to appreciate yourself long enough to find a successful and good relationship.
An addictive relationship tends to isolate either or both partners from the outdide world. It is the exact same thing as a drug dependence something that keeps them away from the things that they love and the other things that they should be doing. An addictive relationship is truly a dysfunctional relationship because it is defined by an increasing craving to be with a person, and by withdrawal symptoms that go along with being away from them. It also has the some of the same signs as other addictions, such as low self-esteem, passivity, magical thinking, lack of initiative, and helplessness.
Here are 7 indicators of an addictive relationship. If you find that your relationship has these things or any number of them, chances are good that you are in a bad relationship, and should consider getting out of it.
1. If you feel that you are magnetically drawn to another person, even if the person is not good for you, it might be a dysfunctional relationship. This might include a person that is too far away, married, not interested, or emotionally unavailable. If these things are true about your partner, yet you feel like you are drawn to them, it could be an addictive relationship.
2. If you try to change the person that you are with in order to be a person that you’d like to be with, this is not a good relationship to be in. If you find yourself constantly thinking that the relationship would be perfect if the person could just change a little bit, it is a sign of a bad relationship.
3. If know that the relationships is bad for you, but you are not able to break it off, this is a sign of an addictive relationship. you may not feel deserving of a positive relationship, perhaps you are so worried about the others reaction to a break up you lose sight of your own needs. Either way, these are signs of a negative relationship.
4. If you notice the realtioships of other happy people seem boring compared to yours, it may be a sign you are hooked on the chaos of an addictive relationship. There is a big probability that you would spurn these people to stay in your current relationship.
5. If you don’t feel that you can be independent within your relationship, even though you might be independent in other areas, it might be a sign of an addictive relationship.
6. If it is hard to say ‘no’ and stick to it and you find yourself always giving in to your partners needs, this is another sign.
7. If your relationship makes you feel self-doubt, it is a sign that your relationship is dysfunctional.
If you find that you are in an addictive relationship, the best thing to do is to get out of the relationship. However, seek help from family and friends, and even professionals, so that you can avoid going back to the person, and so that you can learn how to appreciate yourself long enough to find a successful and good relationship.
Compatibility Relationship Test - Could This Solve the Problem of the Soaring Rate of Divorce?
A compatibility relationship test in some ways should be mandatory for you before you get together in a relationship.
The reason I say this is because too often people make decisions without considering what the long term ramifications can be.
It is well known the divorce rate is very high in almost all countries of the developed world, let alone the number of people who separate after long term arrangements where they are not married, and therefore are not included in these statistics.
I’m sure avoiding marriage relationship problems would be achieved to some extent, if more people undertook a compatibility relationship test before proceeding to get together.
What often happens is people become infatuated or inspired with an intense but short-lived passion or admiration for each other, and go ahead with a marriage or relationship on that basis, without any compatibility quizzes.
It is not surprising when you have problems in your relationship if you go down that road as a consequence of that intense passion.
It is so important you are clear about their being a genuine feeling of love between you that a love compatibility test would show, before making any decision regarding the long term. If you are not sure, take your time.
It is not worth getting into a situation where you have committed yourself, and then have to deal with the hassles of handling relationship problems associated with ways to end relationships. A compatibility relationship test could be a way of checking where you stand.
There are so many relationship questions to ask when you find yourself in the situation of considering if you are going to establish an on-going committed relationship with another person, regardless of whether that involves getting married or not. It is so important you have a compatibility match.
People have different ideas about a whole range of issues in connection to marriage and relationships. If you are not clear about where you both stand in relation to a lot of these before getting together with a relationship test, there will be many basic relationship problems to deal with.
An issue such as monogamy, for example. I’m told it is not an uncommon gay relationship problem. Regardless of orientation, it is something each person needs to know where the other stands before embarking on a relationship.
A compatibility relationship test will clarify where each of you stands regarding such things as values, attitudes and beliefs. A serious relationship problem is inevitable if these matters are a bone of contention between you.
An example of this is that your values are very much aligned with having trust in relationships, and your prospective partner is the complete opposite, believing cheating in relationships is quite acceptable.
It would not work out very well if you got together and then discovered your partner thought along those lines. As far as I am concerned, it definitely would be a recipe for disaster and involve relationship commitment problems if your partner thought this way.
A compatibility relationship test would also reveal where each of you stands as far as integrity is concerned. If this is an important value for you, and you discover in a compatibility quiz test it is not for your prospective partner, run for your life.
Let’s be clear about it. To have integrity involves being honest and having strong moral principles. It means sincerity, truthfulness and trustworthiness are your life’s guideposts. Can you imagine the turmoil ahead if this is not a shared value and you would be able to discover this by means of a compatibility quiz.
Marriage relationship problems would also be inevitable if you have different attitudes. If you are an optimist and your partner a pessimist, forget about it, there is really no chance of a successful relationship.
If you have different beliefs, you may be a devout christian or a fundamentalist, and your prospective partner an atheist, a compatibility relationship test would let you know this.
Your approach to life would be very different, making it difficult for you to connect and this would affect your level of intimacy and communication.
The same can be said if you have different political affiliations. It is difficult to imagine how you would relate to each other at a deep level.
I am aware of several people where there are these relationship compatibility questions who have been married for a long time. I know they are not really happy, but they stay together, virtually leading separate lives.
If you dismiss the compatibility relationship test, and proceed with the marriage or relationship and there are all these differences, you are heading for a situation fraught with peril.
There will always be this underlying nagging feeling of discontent, that gnaws away inside you, and prevents you from ever experiencing joyousness.
This may become so much part of who you are, you can lose virtually all capacity for sustained peace of mind.
Staying in an unrewarding, stifling, or whatever sort of relationship it is for you, is a big sacrifice to make. There will be no acknowledgment of your achievement, nor awards or prizes.
Do the compatibility relationship test and take head of the results. You are now at a fork in the road of life, and the decision you make will have major consequences for the rest of your lifetime.
The reason I say this is because too often people make decisions without considering what the long term ramifications can be.
It is well known the divorce rate is very high in almost all countries of the developed world, let alone the number of people who separate after long term arrangements where they are not married, and therefore are not included in these statistics.
I’m sure avoiding marriage relationship problems would be achieved to some extent, if more people undertook a compatibility relationship test before proceeding to get together.
What often happens is people become infatuated or inspired with an intense but short-lived passion or admiration for each other, and go ahead with a marriage or relationship on that basis, without any compatibility quizzes.
It is not surprising when you have problems in your relationship if you go down that road as a consequence of that intense passion.
It is so important you are clear about their being a genuine feeling of love between you that a love compatibility test would show, before making any decision regarding the long term. If you are not sure, take your time.
It is not worth getting into a situation where you have committed yourself, and then have to deal with the hassles of handling relationship problems associated with ways to end relationships. A compatibility relationship test could be a way of checking where you stand.
There are so many relationship questions to ask when you find yourself in the situation of considering if you are going to establish an on-going committed relationship with another person, regardless of whether that involves getting married or not. It is so important you have a compatibility match.
People have different ideas about a whole range of issues in connection to marriage and relationships. If you are not clear about where you both stand in relation to a lot of these before getting together with a relationship test, there will be many basic relationship problems to deal with.
An issue such as monogamy, for example. I’m told it is not an uncommon gay relationship problem. Regardless of orientation, it is something each person needs to know where the other stands before embarking on a relationship.
A compatibility relationship test will clarify where each of you stands regarding such things as values, attitudes and beliefs. A serious relationship problem is inevitable if these matters are a bone of contention between you.
An example of this is that your values are very much aligned with having trust in relationships, and your prospective partner is the complete opposite, believing cheating in relationships is quite acceptable.
It would not work out very well if you got together and then discovered your partner thought along those lines. As far as I am concerned, it definitely would be a recipe for disaster and involve relationship commitment problems if your partner thought this way.
A compatibility relationship test would also reveal where each of you stands as far as integrity is concerned. If this is an important value for you, and you discover in a compatibility quiz test it is not for your prospective partner, run for your life.
Let’s be clear about it. To have integrity involves being honest and having strong moral principles. It means sincerity, truthfulness and trustworthiness are your life’s guideposts. Can you imagine the turmoil ahead if this is not a shared value and you would be able to discover this by means of a compatibility quiz.
Marriage relationship problems would also be inevitable if you have different attitudes. If you are an optimist and your partner a pessimist, forget about it, there is really no chance of a successful relationship.
If you have different beliefs, you may be a devout christian or a fundamentalist, and your prospective partner an atheist, a compatibility relationship test would let you know this.
Your approach to life would be very different, making it difficult for you to connect and this would affect your level of intimacy and communication.
The same can be said if you have different political affiliations. It is difficult to imagine how you would relate to each other at a deep level.
I am aware of several people where there are these relationship compatibility questions who have been married for a long time. I know they are not really happy, but they stay together, virtually leading separate lives.
If you dismiss the compatibility relationship test, and proceed with the marriage or relationship and there are all these differences, you are heading for a situation fraught with peril.
There will always be this underlying nagging feeling of discontent, that gnaws away inside you, and prevents you from ever experiencing joyousness.
This may become so much part of who you are, you can lose virtually all capacity for sustained peace of mind.
Staying in an unrewarding, stifling, or whatever sort of relationship it is for you, is a big sacrifice to make. There will be no acknowledgment of your achievement, nor awards or prizes.
Do the compatibility relationship test and take head of the results. You are now at a fork in the road of life, and the decision you make will have major consequences for the rest of your lifetime.
How To Have A Succesful Long Distance Relationship?
Long Distance relationships are a true test to a couple\’s commitment and personal limits. LDRs take a great amount of effort to maintain and often people involved in them, realize that they evolve into a state of emotion that they never found themselves in before. When your partner is miles away from you, it is very easy to let things go wrong and lead your long distance romance to an early death. Some people find it difficult to bridge the distance through communication, others become overly obsessed with what their partner is doing when they are not there and as a result they spiral down a road of jealousy and suspicion. They key is balance and following some basic steps to keep your relationship healthy and strong.
Communicate and visit often
It cannot be stressed enough how important communication is for every relationship, especially if it is an LDR. With the distance working to keep you and your sweetie apart, your defense is keeping all lines of communication open. It doesn\’t matter how you do it as long as you do it. Every long distance couple should find ways to communicate that make both partners comfortable and happy. You can talk on the phone everyday, send e-mails, faxes or text messages and whatever you do make sure you share your feelings and expectations and be true to one another. Try to make the time to visit each other as often as possible or as often as your budget permits you to. A relationship cannot thrive if the only thing you have is the phone calls. You need to see each other up close and personal every chance you get. The key here is to set up some \”rules\” about frequency of communication and visits and stick to them, consistency can help a LDR survive. (Check our Communicate Better and Travel section)
Avoid jealousy and be trusting
One of the easiest ways to destroy a perfectly healthy relationship is to poison it with jealousy and drama. When you start a long distance relationship you must be realistic of the difficulties ahead. It always helps if you go in a relationship with the idea that everyone is innocent and worth of trust until proven otherwise. Don\’t fall in the trap to interrogate your partner every time he/she decides to go out for a drink with people you haven\’t met or he/she didn\’t get back to you right away when you called and left a message. Just because you are in a LDR, you lives won\’t pause. Your partner will naturally have a social life where he/she lives and so should you. Sure it helps to have your eyes open and not be totally naive but being overly suspicious is unhealthy for you and your relationship too. You should both maintain your social activity and be happy with yourselves.
Be positive
Staying positive and not focusing on the negative aspects of a LDR is essential to keeping your relationship blooming and your partner content. Being away from your sweetie is not all bad news. Use the opportunity of personal time to pursue your interests and hobbies as well as your career objectives. Another positive points it that long distance dating pushes both of you to be more creative, communicate better since you don\’t have \”face-to-face\” time and test your feelings. As long as you see the long distance relationship as a temporary state, you will keep your chin up and transmit that feeling of security and happiness to your partner too.
Long distance dating is all about a balanced relationship between partners; a relationship built on strong foundations of trust, understanding and determination to make it work. The two partners should be reasonable about their expectations and willing to cooperate so that this relationship can lead to a happy ending. If these parameters are taken care of, you have nothing to worry about.
Communicate and visit often
It cannot be stressed enough how important communication is for every relationship, especially if it is an LDR. With the distance working to keep you and your sweetie apart, your defense is keeping all lines of communication open. It doesn\’t matter how you do it as long as you do it. Every long distance couple should find ways to communicate that make both partners comfortable and happy. You can talk on the phone everyday, send e-mails, faxes or text messages and whatever you do make sure you share your feelings and expectations and be true to one another. Try to make the time to visit each other as often as possible or as often as your budget permits you to. A relationship cannot thrive if the only thing you have is the phone calls. You need to see each other up close and personal every chance you get. The key here is to set up some \”rules\” about frequency of communication and visits and stick to them, consistency can help a LDR survive. (Check our Communicate Better and Travel section)
Avoid jealousy and be trusting
One of the easiest ways to destroy a perfectly healthy relationship is to poison it with jealousy and drama. When you start a long distance relationship you must be realistic of the difficulties ahead. It always helps if you go in a relationship with the idea that everyone is innocent and worth of trust until proven otherwise. Don\’t fall in the trap to interrogate your partner every time he/she decides to go out for a drink with people you haven\’t met or he/she didn\’t get back to you right away when you called and left a message. Just because you are in a LDR, you lives won\’t pause. Your partner will naturally have a social life where he/she lives and so should you. Sure it helps to have your eyes open and not be totally naive but being overly suspicious is unhealthy for you and your relationship too. You should both maintain your social activity and be happy with yourselves.
Be positive
Staying positive and not focusing on the negative aspects of a LDR is essential to keeping your relationship blooming and your partner content. Being away from your sweetie is not all bad news. Use the opportunity of personal time to pursue your interests and hobbies as well as your career objectives. Another positive points it that long distance dating pushes both of you to be more creative, communicate better since you don\’t have \”face-to-face\” time and test your feelings. As long as you see the long distance relationship as a temporary state, you will keep your chin up and transmit that feeling of security and happiness to your partner too.
Long distance dating is all about a balanced relationship between partners; a relationship built on strong foundations of trust, understanding and determination to make it work. The two partners should be reasonable about their expectations and willing to cooperate so that this relationship can lead to a happy ending. If these parameters are taken care of, you have nothing to worry about.
How To Build Lasting Relationships
Relationships of all kinds are often perceived as very sensitive matters that require extra effort to maintain. However, a relationship can also be something that can provide security and can also be long lasting despite many trials.
Building effective and lasting relationships is necessary for several reasons in the business world. For example in a group or organization, the well being of the people depends on how efficient and effective that group or organization works. An effective and efficient group or organization will provide a good work culture as well as productivity for the company.
The group or organization is also dependent on how the members work well with the management or administration. An ineffective group or organization can really be very frustrating. An effective group or organization can also ask so much on their members, that sometimes the members would be having no life outside the walls of the area where they work or sacrifice the other aspects of their life just to meet deadlines. For an organization or group with this kind of scenario, relationships can be stressed or suffer from breakdown.
People or other entities that depend on these groups or organization also suffer. Society is defined as a web of relationships, which requires all parties to work and contribute their share in order to achieve a common goal. Having a relationship that is good, where cooperation and respect are manifested can make society work better. In this way each member works for the good of the whole and towards achieving a common goal. This can only be attained with effective and efficient relationships.
Understanding the other parties’ feelings and position creates an effective and efficient relationship. The easiest method to understand what is important to another party is to ask them what they want and listen to what they have to say. When the other party realizes this, they would feel the importance given to them. They would also feel a sense of belong in an understanding relationship.
Effective and efficient relationships require parties to express their feelings and positions openly on all matters pertinent to the relationship. Assuming that the other party understands our needs and give us what we need it without asking for it is not a good practice. We are human beings and we cannot read other people’s minds. So, communicating our needs and expressing our feelings will further contribute to effective and efficient relationships.
Respect is the essential key to a successful relationship. In order to create a more effective relationship, parties should treat each other with respect. We can show respect just by listening to the other party and by trying sincerely to understand how they function. You can also show respect to other parties by confirming that they are doing everything they can.
The opposite of respect is being judgmental based on unfounded facts and prejudice. Always take time to listen and request for clarification to every situation before making a final judgment. Respect is the very foundation for a great relationship and being judgmental can jeopardize the trusting and respectful connection in a relationship. This also means respecting yourself and respecting others.
Another key area in forming an effective relationship is to tackle differences of the other party directly. Differences between parties or people are quite interesting. For example in a conversation where each party listens to the other party, you may observe that each is having two different perspectives. Be ready to accept the differences and try to make use of the different perspectives as positive compliments to the relationship.
Work towards a win-win solution for both parties. This can be done when at least one party acknowledges that the relationship is important. That party would then exert more time, effort and energy to understand the other party’s needs and deal with it to get it out of the way. When faced with a contrasting opinion, find the best solution or compromise that would solve the problem without damaging either parties. Should they fail, it is comforting for that party to know that they tried.
Developing an atmosphere where the other party can express their feelings at ease by effectively listening without pre-judging. This is important if parties are to understand each other. Informal discussions are conducive for parties. They bring out issues and concerns comfortably. They also feel more relaxed making them think more clearly. When parties fail to express whatever is on their mind or their feelings, it can get in the way of building an effective relationship.
Parties should be aware that certain things exist naturally but should be controlled in any dealings in any relationship. Human nature is one of these things found in a relationship. Also include a history of stereotyping or mistrust, blaming the other person or party for a strained relationship, excluding the other party’s feelings when focusing on a task, no clear and defined objectives, roles and expectations of each party in a relationship is also unclear.
Relationships are important to everyone. Addressing issues and problems right away is a must to further improve the relationship. As they say ‘No man is an Island’.
Building effective and lasting relationships is necessary for several reasons in the business world. For example in a group or organization, the well being of the people depends on how efficient and effective that group or organization works. An effective and efficient group or organization will provide a good work culture as well as productivity for the company.
The group or organization is also dependent on how the members work well with the management or administration. An ineffective group or organization can really be very frustrating. An effective group or organization can also ask so much on their members, that sometimes the members would be having no life outside the walls of the area where they work or sacrifice the other aspects of their life just to meet deadlines. For an organization or group with this kind of scenario, relationships can be stressed or suffer from breakdown.
People or other entities that depend on these groups or organization also suffer. Society is defined as a web of relationships, which requires all parties to work and contribute their share in order to achieve a common goal. Having a relationship that is good, where cooperation and respect are manifested can make society work better. In this way each member works for the good of the whole and towards achieving a common goal. This can only be attained with effective and efficient relationships.
Understanding the other parties’ feelings and position creates an effective and efficient relationship. The easiest method to understand what is important to another party is to ask them what they want and listen to what they have to say. When the other party realizes this, they would feel the importance given to them. They would also feel a sense of belong in an understanding relationship.
Effective and efficient relationships require parties to express their feelings and positions openly on all matters pertinent to the relationship. Assuming that the other party understands our needs and give us what we need it without asking for it is not a good practice. We are human beings and we cannot read other people’s minds. So, communicating our needs and expressing our feelings will further contribute to effective and efficient relationships.
Respect is the essential key to a successful relationship. In order to create a more effective relationship, parties should treat each other with respect. We can show respect just by listening to the other party and by trying sincerely to understand how they function. You can also show respect to other parties by confirming that they are doing everything they can.
The opposite of respect is being judgmental based on unfounded facts and prejudice. Always take time to listen and request for clarification to every situation before making a final judgment. Respect is the very foundation for a great relationship and being judgmental can jeopardize the trusting and respectful connection in a relationship. This also means respecting yourself and respecting others.
Another key area in forming an effective relationship is to tackle differences of the other party directly. Differences between parties or people are quite interesting. For example in a conversation where each party listens to the other party, you may observe that each is having two different perspectives. Be ready to accept the differences and try to make use of the different perspectives as positive compliments to the relationship.
Work towards a win-win solution for both parties. This can be done when at least one party acknowledges that the relationship is important. That party would then exert more time, effort and energy to understand the other party’s needs and deal with it to get it out of the way. When faced with a contrasting opinion, find the best solution or compromise that would solve the problem without damaging either parties. Should they fail, it is comforting for that party to know that they tried.
Developing an atmosphere where the other party can express their feelings at ease by effectively listening without pre-judging. This is important if parties are to understand each other. Informal discussions are conducive for parties. They bring out issues and concerns comfortably. They also feel more relaxed making them think more clearly. When parties fail to express whatever is on their mind or their feelings, it can get in the way of building an effective relationship.
Parties should be aware that certain things exist naturally but should be controlled in any dealings in any relationship. Human nature is one of these things found in a relationship. Also include a history of stereotyping or mistrust, blaming the other person or party for a strained relationship, excluding the other party’s feelings when focusing on a task, no clear and defined objectives, roles and expectations of each party in a relationship is also unclear.
Relationships are important to everyone. Addressing issues and problems right away is a must to further improve the relationship. As they say ‘No man is an Island’.
Experiences From ‘the Flow’ (20): the Good Tilt - Maintaining and Enhancing Your Compatible Relationship
By Carl “J.C.” Pantejo, Copyright March 2008
(Author “My Friend Yu – The Prosperity Mentor,” Copyright August 2007. Pantejo - Y.N. Vurce Publishing.)
“Prosperity: The eternal flow of all that’s good in life…”
*Below is the twentieth episode based on a series of real life events experienced by the author. The only deviations from the truth may be the names of people and places. These stories are also incorporated in “My Friend Yu – the Prosperity Mentor: Book II,” Pantejo - Y.N. Vurce Publishing. Release Date: 2008.
- Review Questions -
1. Remember the Communication issues discussed in “Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (11)…” and that Miscommunication can cause half of all relationship problems?
2. Have you looked at Your List, the list of your personal Needs and Desires lately (“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ [12])?
3. Does Your List represent your current Vital and Important needs/desires (as discussed in “Experiences from ‘The Flow’ [13]…”); or have your needs/desires drastically changed?
4. When you now weigh your items on your personal Satisfaction Scale (“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ [14]…”), is the picture the same; or has it changed from Compatibility to Incompatibility?
5. Has your once Compatible Relationship turned into a Neutral Relationship? If so, please re-examine the ins and outs of Neutral Relationships (“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ [15]…”).
6. Are you succumbing to Fear and letting a Neutral or Incompatible Relationship continue to siphon joy from your life? Maybe you should remember the salient points in “Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (16) and (17)…”?
(By the way, the English friend I mentioned in (17) is back in his home country and doing well. The other friend who opted to stay is still the same – miserable. He sure has a lot more patience than me!).
7. If you are in a relationship with a Bar Girl, are you beginning to understand the challenges you face? As described in the last two articles “Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (18) and (19)…,” Bar Girls can be difficult to fathom. They are truly a different breed, aren’t they?
The point of all these questions?
You must constantly evaluate the status of your relationship.
If something doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t. If something feels good, how can you increase it?
Too many people get blind-sided because they don’t monitor the important things in their own lives, especially relationships.
Fear, ignorance, or pure complacency can easily cause a Compatible Relationship to deteriorate (oftentimes, very rapidly) into one of its lesser cousins (Neutral and/or Incompatible).
Relationships behave like living things. They need constant care and nourishment to flourish.
They must grow or die.
How can you keep yours alive and thriving?
- Stay in the Present -
Review Your List.
Why? Nothing stays the same. Like all things in life, we all change.
If you refuse to accept this fact of life, you’ll end up spending most of your time lamenting the loss of things (and days) gone by.
How sad this is.
- Coulda’, Woulda’, Shoulda’ -
It reminds me of most of the retired military veterans I’ve met in Asia.
Without a nest egg, passive income (from investments), a follow-on career, or business, they are forced to live within their moderate military pensions; hence, they hang out at U.S. military base bars in Asia almost every night.
They desperately seek others who will patiently sit with them and offer a sympathetic ear. Then they re-live their pasts (over and over again).
When in good spirits, they embellish their nostalgia and tell their stories of romantic conquests and heroic military achievements – to anyone who will listen.
But when feeling down, all one can hear is their “coulda’, woulda’, shoulda’” stories.
In other words, they are stuck in the past.
Regarding your relationship, are you still in the past?
The past is past. Stay in the present.
- In the Present -
Update Your List to reflect your current needs and desires. Do the Compatibility Analysis again.
Look at your new, current Satisfaction Scale.
What does it look like?
What are the Pluses in your relationship now? How can you regain Pluses that have disappeared? How can you add more Pluses or strengthen existing ones. Be creative.
Are the old Minuses still there? Why?
For example, if language was a Minus, why haven’t you and her worked on alleviating the problem?
Compared to the beginning of your relationship, are there additional Minuses now? If so, why? Are they insurmountable? Can you fix them (or permit them and still continue the relationship)?
- Accept Reality -
Remember that nothing stands still.
This includes relationships – especially neglected ones.
Has your relationship gotten better?
Whether yes or no, you must accept reality.
Great and good relationships must be nurtured to continue (and hopefully become even better, stronger). How is this done? Simple. Add more Pluses and lessen the Minuses!
Adding Pluses and lessening Minuses can also bring Newly Neutral Relationships back from the brink with a minimum of hassle and pain.
But if it’s not worth it anymore, don’t escalate your commitment. Take your losses and move on.
- Farang, Know Thyself! -
Some readers may think that this whole series of articles on relationships and compatibility is somewhat self-centered and selfish.
You bet you’re a$$ it is!
No one can control you - but you.
Left uncontrolled (that is, having no self-discipline) and ignorant, most new Farangs (Thai: foreigners) lose out big time in Thailand.
Think of it.
The communication issue already puts Farangs at a huge disadvantage. The culture lends itself to exploiting Farangs because, in their eyes, “all foreigners are rich!”
And our funny, foreign ways are as amusing to them as theirs are to us. Thai people have no qualms at laughing at our “weird ways.”
But since this is their country, we must not be blatant about our own amusement (e.g., pointing at them and laughing – like they so often do to us); it would make them lose face and eventually affect us negatively.
Love and romance is intimately entwined with money in Thailand – something totally foreign to most foreigners. The Love/Money issue leads to all the stereotypical sob stories of heartbreak, anger, and bankruptcy that I hear about daily.
(Ultimately, that makes us Farangs “Traveling Side-Shows and walking ATMs.”)
- The Invisible Hand -
You must accept the fact that you can’t change anyone else.
If the true natures of each person in a relationship are incompatible, why continue? For all concerned, it is far better to move on to a more naturally suitable partner or to simply live alone.
To continue living with an incompatible partner is a recipe for chronic misery.
Don’t feel guilty about expressing what you need and want to others (and more importantly, to yourself). Lying to others and yourself is stupid and will only lead to unhappiness.
Akin to Adam Smith’s economic “Invisible Hand,” I believe in “The Invisible Hand” of relationships. If each person acts in their own best interest, all will profit. Compatibility will find more Compatibility. Less time, energy, and resources will be wasted on Incompatible people and relationships.
If it’s not a win/win, you really should walk away.
When more people are true to themselves, that is, they know who they are and what they truly want from a relationship/partner, more relationships would succeed instead of fail.
And more time can be spent on enjoying Compatible ones.
- 7 Recommendations -
1. Constantly evaluate your situation.
2. Remember that relationships need to keep growing to stay alive. This means you must continually add Pluses and lessen Minuses.
3. Accept Reality. Don’t escalate commitment in a doomed relationship.
4. Don’t feel guilty about seeking what you need and want.
5. By all means, remember that life was meant to be happy and fulfilling. Why waste it on a lose/win relationship?
6. You can not change anyone who doesn’t want to change!
7. You can only control yourself.
“Until next time, find ‘The Flow’ and jump in!”
Your Friend in this Intrepid Journey called Life,
Carl “J.C.” Pantejo
Farang, Thailand, compatible, relationship, bar girl, pluses, minuses, advice, Invisible Hand, escalate commitment, scale, needs, desires.
Note: If you want to read more about Asian and Western cultural differences, finding unconditional love, exorcising past personal demons, and the Illusive Secret of Happiness, please read the following articles:
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’: From Heartbreak to Happiness”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (2): Coincidence or Synchronicity: FROM RELAPSE TO MIRACLES…”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (3): LOST AND FOUND - Kindred Spirits and Mistakes made in Haste.”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (4): LOST AND FOUND – Meant to Be?”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (5): “The Stray”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (6): “New Beginnings, Old Endings”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (7) - Living Well? Farangs and Finance: The Myth”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (8) Living Well? Farangs and Finance: The Reality, Stupidity, and Hard Knocks.”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (9): New Girlfriend, New Life.”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (10): Farangs and Asians – Polarized Views.”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (11) - Farangs: In (or considering) a long-term Western/Asian Relationship? Read This Now!
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (12) - Farang: Square Peg, Round Hole? Compatibility Issues.”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (13) - Farang: Compatibility Issues II”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (14) - Farang: Tipping the Scales. Good or Bad?”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (15) - Farang: Interpretation of Your Results.”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (16) - Farang: Make Your Scale Sway or Walk Away.”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (17) - Farang: Further Interpretation. Lopsided Scales.”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (18): A Good Tilt with a Bar Girl?”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (19): Another Good Tilt with a Bar Girl?”
“How Dare She! Out of Desperation I Learned How to Forgive”
“Remember Who You Are!”
“Need to Heal Your Broken Heart? Read on. Overcome Heartbreak and Learn the Illusive Secret of Happiness.”
(By Carl “J.C.” Pantejo and published internet-wide, keyword: [title of article] or “Carl Pantejo”)
Pantejo@ynvurcepublishing.com
(Author “My Friend Yu – The Prosperity Mentor,” Copyright August 2007. Pantejo - Y.N. Vurce Publishing.)
“Prosperity: The eternal flow of all that’s good in life…”
*Below is the twentieth episode based on a series of real life events experienced by the author. The only deviations from the truth may be the names of people and places. These stories are also incorporated in “My Friend Yu – the Prosperity Mentor: Book II,” Pantejo - Y.N. Vurce Publishing. Release Date: 2008.
- Review Questions -
1. Remember the Communication issues discussed in “Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (11)…” and that Miscommunication can cause half of all relationship problems?
2. Have you looked at Your List, the list of your personal Needs and Desires lately (“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ [12])?
3. Does Your List represent your current Vital and Important needs/desires (as discussed in “Experiences from ‘The Flow’ [13]…”); or have your needs/desires drastically changed?
4. When you now weigh your items on your personal Satisfaction Scale (“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ [14]…”), is the picture the same; or has it changed from Compatibility to Incompatibility?
5. Has your once Compatible Relationship turned into a Neutral Relationship? If so, please re-examine the ins and outs of Neutral Relationships (“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ [15]…”).
6. Are you succumbing to Fear and letting a Neutral or Incompatible Relationship continue to siphon joy from your life? Maybe you should remember the salient points in “Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (16) and (17)…”?
(By the way, the English friend I mentioned in (17) is back in his home country and doing well. The other friend who opted to stay is still the same – miserable. He sure has a lot more patience than me!).
7. If you are in a relationship with a Bar Girl, are you beginning to understand the challenges you face? As described in the last two articles “Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (18) and (19)…,” Bar Girls can be difficult to fathom. They are truly a different breed, aren’t they?
The point of all these questions?
You must constantly evaluate the status of your relationship.
If something doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t. If something feels good, how can you increase it?
Too many people get blind-sided because they don’t monitor the important things in their own lives, especially relationships.
Fear, ignorance, or pure complacency can easily cause a Compatible Relationship to deteriorate (oftentimes, very rapidly) into one of its lesser cousins (Neutral and/or Incompatible).
Relationships behave like living things. They need constant care and nourishment to flourish.
They must grow or die.
How can you keep yours alive and thriving?
- Stay in the Present -
Review Your List.
Why? Nothing stays the same. Like all things in life, we all change.
If you refuse to accept this fact of life, you’ll end up spending most of your time lamenting the loss of things (and days) gone by.
How sad this is.
- Coulda’, Woulda’, Shoulda’ -
It reminds me of most of the retired military veterans I’ve met in Asia.
Without a nest egg, passive income (from investments), a follow-on career, or business, they are forced to live within their moderate military pensions; hence, they hang out at U.S. military base bars in Asia almost every night.
They desperately seek others who will patiently sit with them and offer a sympathetic ear. Then they re-live their pasts (over and over again).
When in good spirits, they embellish their nostalgia and tell their stories of romantic conquests and heroic military achievements – to anyone who will listen.
But when feeling down, all one can hear is their “coulda’, woulda’, shoulda’” stories.
In other words, they are stuck in the past.
Regarding your relationship, are you still in the past?
The past is past. Stay in the present.
- In the Present -
Update Your List to reflect your current needs and desires. Do the Compatibility Analysis again.
Look at your new, current Satisfaction Scale.
What does it look like?
What are the Pluses in your relationship now? How can you regain Pluses that have disappeared? How can you add more Pluses or strengthen existing ones. Be creative.
Are the old Minuses still there? Why?
For example, if language was a Minus, why haven’t you and her worked on alleviating the problem?
Compared to the beginning of your relationship, are there additional Minuses now? If so, why? Are they insurmountable? Can you fix them (or permit them and still continue the relationship)?
- Accept Reality -
Remember that nothing stands still.
This includes relationships – especially neglected ones.
Has your relationship gotten better?
Whether yes or no, you must accept reality.
Great and good relationships must be nurtured to continue (and hopefully become even better, stronger). How is this done? Simple. Add more Pluses and lessen the Minuses!
Adding Pluses and lessening Minuses can also bring Newly Neutral Relationships back from the brink with a minimum of hassle and pain.
But if it’s not worth it anymore, don’t escalate your commitment. Take your losses and move on.
- Farang, Know Thyself! -
Some readers may think that this whole series of articles on relationships and compatibility is somewhat self-centered and selfish.
You bet you’re a$$ it is!
No one can control you - but you.
Left uncontrolled (that is, having no self-discipline) and ignorant, most new Farangs (Thai: foreigners) lose out big time in Thailand.
Think of it.
The communication issue already puts Farangs at a huge disadvantage. The culture lends itself to exploiting Farangs because, in their eyes, “all foreigners are rich!”
And our funny, foreign ways are as amusing to them as theirs are to us. Thai people have no qualms at laughing at our “weird ways.”
But since this is their country, we must not be blatant about our own amusement (e.g., pointing at them and laughing – like they so often do to us); it would make them lose face and eventually affect us negatively.
Love and romance is intimately entwined with money in Thailand – something totally foreign to most foreigners. The Love/Money issue leads to all the stereotypical sob stories of heartbreak, anger, and bankruptcy that I hear about daily.
(Ultimately, that makes us Farangs “Traveling Side-Shows and walking ATMs.”)
- The Invisible Hand -
You must accept the fact that you can’t change anyone else.
If the true natures of each person in a relationship are incompatible, why continue? For all concerned, it is far better to move on to a more naturally suitable partner or to simply live alone.
To continue living with an incompatible partner is a recipe for chronic misery.
Don’t feel guilty about expressing what you need and want to others (and more importantly, to yourself). Lying to others and yourself is stupid and will only lead to unhappiness.
Akin to Adam Smith’s economic “Invisible Hand,” I believe in “The Invisible Hand” of relationships. If each person acts in their own best interest, all will profit. Compatibility will find more Compatibility. Less time, energy, and resources will be wasted on Incompatible people and relationships.
If it’s not a win/win, you really should walk away.
When more people are true to themselves, that is, they know who they are and what they truly want from a relationship/partner, more relationships would succeed instead of fail.
And more time can be spent on enjoying Compatible ones.
- 7 Recommendations -
1. Constantly evaluate your situation.
2. Remember that relationships need to keep growing to stay alive. This means you must continually add Pluses and lessen Minuses.
3. Accept Reality. Don’t escalate commitment in a doomed relationship.
4. Don’t feel guilty about seeking what you need and want.
5. By all means, remember that life was meant to be happy and fulfilling. Why waste it on a lose/win relationship?
6. You can not change anyone who doesn’t want to change!
7. You can only control yourself.
“Until next time, find ‘The Flow’ and jump in!”
Your Friend in this Intrepid Journey called Life,
Carl “J.C.” Pantejo
Farang, Thailand, compatible, relationship, bar girl, pluses, minuses, advice, Invisible Hand, escalate commitment, scale, needs, desires.
Note: If you want to read more about Asian and Western cultural differences, finding unconditional love, exorcising past personal demons, and the Illusive Secret of Happiness, please read the following articles:
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’: From Heartbreak to Happiness”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (2): Coincidence or Synchronicity: FROM RELAPSE TO MIRACLES…”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (3): LOST AND FOUND - Kindred Spirits and Mistakes made in Haste.”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (4): LOST AND FOUND – Meant to Be?”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (5): “The Stray”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (6): “New Beginnings, Old Endings”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (7) - Living Well? Farangs and Finance: The Myth”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (8) Living Well? Farangs and Finance: The Reality, Stupidity, and Hard Knocks.”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (9): New Girlfriend, New Life.”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (10): Farangs and Asians – Polarized Views.”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (11) - Farangs: In (or considering) a long-term Western/Asian Relationship? Read This Now!
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (12) - Farang: Square Peg, Round Hole? Compatibility Issues.”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (13) - Farang: Compatibility Issues II”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (14) - Farang: Tipping the Scales. Good or Bad?”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (15) - Farang: Interpretation of Your Results.”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (16) - Farang: Make Your Scale Sway or Walk Away.”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (17) - Farang: Further Interpretation. Lopsided Scales.”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (18): A Good Tilt with a Bar Girl?”
“Experiences from ‘The Flow’ (19): Another Good Tilt with a Bar Girl?”
“How Dare She! Out of Desperation I Learned How to Forgive”
“Remember Who You Are!”
“Need to Heal Your Broken Heart? Read on. Overcome Heartbreak and Learn the Illusive Secret of Happiness.”
(By Carl “J.C.” Pantejo and published internet-wide, keyword: [title of article] or “Carl Pantejo”)
Pantejo@ynvurcepublishing.com